but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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