You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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