You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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