I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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