i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
