Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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