"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
