I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
