shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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