oh god the rape fog is back!
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
