Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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