Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
