Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
