Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a Shit stain on my heart
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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