3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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