K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
