Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
