Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
