you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
