i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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