Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
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