Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Apparently you make a good broom.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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