Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
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