I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Houston, we have a squirter
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
