just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Bring me that man meat
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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