dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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