I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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