You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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