One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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