Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I just blew my weed a kiss
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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