why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
