you win again, gameday.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
