Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
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