Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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