mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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