He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
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He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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