I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
