I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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