Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
