Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
