I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
