She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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