Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
