i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Two words: nipple clamps
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