No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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