Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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