i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize