I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
