is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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