I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
