all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize