they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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